Let this be a warning to you about getting silly during instant message sessions. Paramount owns Voyager. We own these. Got a terrible Trek limerick you would like to share? Please send it to YCD!
ELOGIUM
When Kes started acting outrageous,
Her desire proved to be contagious.
The aliens turned blue--
The first officer, too--
But for Janeway, that was advantageous...
--MYCD
THE 37s
Lost over the ocean with Fred
She was widely presumed to be dead,
But Amelia Earhart
Got a new start
When aliens froze her instead.
--MYCD
RESOLUTIONS
Stranded with Chakotay so hunky,
Kathryn remained a science junkie.
Even in that warm climate
She preferred a primate,
So Chak was left spanking the monkey.
--MYCD
CODA
After all the blows to his dignitas,
Chakotay was feeling quite frivolous.
Gave the captain a rose,
Took off all his clothes,
And said, "Kathryn, just look at how big it is!"
--MYCD
UNITY
When Chakotay joined the Collective
For a full-body bio-corrective,
He opened his mind
Riley answered in kind
Then they turned toward matters erective.
SCORPION PART II
Chak used to be Janeway's best friend,
Her path he would always defend.
But now she's the ice queen,
Celibate and mean,
Her morals she's not willing to bend.
--BS
THE KILLING GAME
Captain Miller had followed Catrine
To a Klingon-infested ravine;
He thought he might get lucky,
But his timing was sucky
When he had to go to the latrine.
--MYCD
LIVING WITNESS
Evil Janeway pulled off one black glove,
Said, "Chakotay, I'm needing some love."
But her tattooed XO
Was in a blow-by-blow
With Tom Paris, when push came to shove.
UNFORGETTABLE
After five years of mooning a lot,
Chakotay found Kellin quite hot.
She came onto the ship
For the rest of the trip,
Knocked on his door, then...I forgot.
NIGHT
Captain Janeway was really more fun
When she had her hair in a bun.
Since she chopped off the length
She's lost all of her strength...
Now all she's got is a big gun.
--BS
COUNTERPOINT
After five years of celibate bore,
Janeway's ship met up with the Devore
And though she won the struggle,
Kashyk snuck in a snuggle,
So I'd have to say he won the war.
--MYCD
THE FIGHT
There was a man named Chakotay
Whose hair was lovely black and gray
Till he went for a bottle
To get rid of the mottle;
Now his locks look just like a toupee.
--Captain Oz and MYCD
THE DISEASE
Chak's fattest, Tom's longest, but Harry
Has a dick that's entirely scary.
It's purple and skinny
And his balls are so mini
That the Delaneys both prefer Carey.
BRIDE OF CHAOTICA
When Kate's dressed as the Bride of Chaotica,
Our thoughts turn of course to erotica,
But since this Star Trek
Libidos stay in check;
One cannot even think of exotica.
--Cybermum
ON SEASON SIX
While on board her Starfleet vessel
The Captain refuses to nestle
With this explanation
"I've had no temptation -
'Til now there's been no one to wrestle."
But coming up in Season Six
There will be pugilistic tricks
Ratings are vital
They've found a new title:
Janeway: Delta Dominatrix.
--Cybermum
AND SOME TERRIBLE DS9 LIMERICKS!
There was a legate named Damar
Who loved to guzzle down kanar
Till one day he got hot
And came on to Dukat --
Now he's barred from every Cardie bar.
A Starfleet commander named Sisko
Would never avoid any risk, no,
But ask him any day
Of his true goal, he'd say
He always dreamed of running a disco.
There once was a young Trill named Dax
Who preferred her men flat on their backs
But she couldn't complain
When she met Vic Fontaine
Who played her to holo-climax.
There was a bad boy named Dukat
Who wanted to see Bajor rot
Down in the Fire-Caves
His villainy won raves
But he's finding it rather too hot.
--MYCD